Can Single Parents Enjoy Romance?

It is true that a divorce is very painful, especially for the children, but nevertheless many people are better off apart, and after they get separated many of them are left single parents. However, this does not mean that they should give up any hope to a new romance.

Even though you only had to think about yourself when you started dating and now there are also your children you have to think about, allow yourself to find love again. You do not have to lose hope when it comes to a new romance, but you do have to be honest with yourself and especially to you children. Explain them why relationships sometimes do not work out and admit that people make mistakes, but in the end everyone deserves to be happy. Parents also have the right to socialize and date other people after they split up with their partner. If you want to avoid your children harboring resentment and confusion in their souls, then honesty is the only fair and straightforward way to do it.

Many single parents are so concerned about their children after a divorce that they start smothering them and give them too much attention, most of time at the expense of their leisure time. You have to draw a clear line between the time you spend with your children and the time you spend for yourself. A child has to know that he is loved by his parents, but at the same time he must understand that his parents are responsible adults who try to move on with their lives and be happy. Raising a spoiled child is not exactly the best thing you can do after a divorce, so just make it clear from the beginning that nobody will ever replace the parents in a child’s life, but that you also need to socialize with people of your own age.

As a parent you already know that your needs are secondary to your children’s healthy development. Any relationship that might threaten the well-being of your children should be cut off in order to protect them. If you decide to have a new romance, it should be compatible to your lifestyle as a parent and make sure your new partner understands and respects your priorities. Your family and friends can actually make the situation easier for you by presenting you possible partners which would correspond to your needs, as they already know the situation you are in.

When you start dating again, you should behave like a single person and not monopolize the conversation with details about parenthood, especially if your partner is not a parent. However, do not try to ignore the topic. You have to make it clear from the very beginning that you are a parent and you have to act accordingly.

A time will come when you will feel comfortable with your new partner and you would like to introduce them to your child. You should not feel ashamed when you embark on a new relationship. The only thing you have to do is to be honest with your child and explain what this person means to you. Spending time together will also make the transition less painful for the children. You should always remember that dating is normal and you should not feel ashamed of it. Everyone needs love and as long as you are honest about it, your children will also realize how the world of adults works.