Chatting online with a potential partner

So you found a good dating site, created an interesting dating profile, sketched the outline of your ideal partner and talked a little about your interest. That wasn’t so hard, was it?

Actually, in order to find a good match you will have to spend more time and energy in order to create a relevant online dating profile. If you find that your profile sticks to the public, then you are on the right track. Still, you should launch your profile only when you feel it’s ready. You could also ask a friend to see it first and give his or her opinion perhaps he/she sees some mistakes which you over-passed.

Here you have some aspects which you should consider when chatting with a potential partner.  

1.       When you have to reject her

If you’re not so interested in a woman, you can reject her gently. You can say something like “Thank you for the conversation. Your opinion is really appreciated but I don’t think that I am the right man for you.”

Avoid giving too many arguments and explanations on why you won’t chat with her in the future. Leave it at that, the message is clear and polite.

2.       Over-enhusiastic

You keep exchanging mails with this woman who lives overseas and at one point she declares her love and affection for you, while all you ever wanted was a beautiful conversation with a stranger. You can make her step out of those dreams and explain to her that you hate the fact that she is so far away and the two of you will never meet in person, but perhaps this is how it has to be.

3.       Comunicational blockage

You feel like you have no replica, no more words to send back. Well that is no reason to sweat since you are not chatting in real life and you can choose when to send back your answer to the last line she wrote. Eventually, you can go and grab a coffee, read a book and only after that, get back to her online with a fresh mind and words.

4.       There’s no need for lying

Don’t post pictures with a fancy car which is not yours, only to give her the impression that you own a Ferrari and increase your chances of getting a date. You shouldn’t either post pictures of yourself when you were 20 years younger and 20 pounds slimmer. You might meet a really valuable woman which you will disappoint when the two of you meet in person.

5.       Go further

Let’s say you already chatted online with her for a few days. If you want to avoid getting her bored and used to this, you could arrange and start talking on the phone or by text messages. It would be even better if the two of you could meet in person and grab a coffee. If she keeps finding reasons to avoid doing so, you should forget about her. It’s obvious that she doesn’t really want to meet you and you should move on.

6.       Share pictures

There are different types of pictures which people share online. Some of them are casual and common simple photos of themselves, to show to the potential partners the way they look and others are X-rated pictures. If you are in search for an easy fling and nothing serious, your favorite X-rated pictures of yourself are a good idea to raise some excitement. But if you plan on finding a serious connection, you should let those images go, at least until you become intimate in person, too.

7.      Video chatting

At this moment you already chatted online on the usual dating sites, you already had long phone conversations and exchanged text messages. The next step before meeting in person is seeing each other at the webcam. Still, you should be careful when communicating over the webcam with the woman you’re interested in since, in the online dating world there are numerous types of scams and traps. It’s recommended to behave respectfully and with good manners.

8.       Open question

Questions which include what, where, when how or why are closed questions which will block a conversation right from the very beginning.

In order to avoid such painful situations you should try something like “I’ve read your profile and I noticed that you are highly interested in cooking. Which is your favorite cuisine?”

At each reply you can offer a little bit of extra information. If she is really interested in you, she will ask for more details.

9.       Seems like a job interview?

You might find online dating resembling a job interview and on many points you are right. Apart from job interviews, in the world of dating your best reference is your personality which you need to release in its best shape.

No matter how hard you might find it to keep up with the questions about your life and interests, try to have patience. If something goes wrong, you can always hit the “delete” button.

10.   Keep meeting new people

Outside the online dating world you still need to be active and concerned about what happens around you. Find out about the local events, participate at social activities and continue meeting new people offline, too. Otherwise, you might find yourself stuck in front of the laptop and communicating with a majority of persons whom you will never meet in real life.