Women should take initiative too

Women should take initiative too


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As men, we are bound to do all the hard work in order to begin a relationship and to make sure it develops nicely.

From the very first eye contact with a woman you are the one who has to initiate conversation, who asks for her contact info, who calls her first, who asks her out first, who says ‘I love you’ first, who proposes the first vacation together, who asks for meeting her family, who asks her to marry you. It sounds awful, right? Yet, we are all accustomed to this mating ritual, where the woman is passive and the one who decides if it’s ‘Yes’ or ‘No’, at least on the really important aspects.

What happened that we got so stuck in this vicious circle of continuously chasing a woman and making most of the effort in getting together, when it’s known that she wants the same thing?

Women asked for equal rights and responsibilities so why don’t they act accordingly? Why do we still take care of the hard work for becoming partners with a woman? It is old school and romantic, you’ll say, and that’s true, but at times it is too much seen as a simple game. It loses its charm when you know that she wants to be with you as much as you do but still pretends that she needs more convincing.

Once I was dating an extremely attractive woman who was also intelligent and fun, but never made any move. Each time we got close and physically intimate was due to my initiative. However, she always seemed to enjoy my attention and tenderness, but she never made a move out of her own will. It was driving me crazy. I wanted her to seduce me back. At that time, I thought that really great women are used to being passive just because it’s enough that they exist and let themselves seduced.

Even if she was gorgeous from every point of view, I decided to move on. She had no initiative and it soon got tiring to be the only one who made effort for our relationship to work.

If you ever meet a great woman, try and educate her in what it means to make a relationship develop. Make her understand that she should also have initiative. Use kind words or a little bit of cocky and funny attitude. For example, if she is enjoying each time you get near her and kiss her neck, next time whisper in her year that if she wants more, she has to say ‘Please’. On the same note, make her understand that in a relationship everything should work like a tennis match- the ball is passed from one to another. 

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